啊~多麼痛的領悟。

從一次又一次地嘗試，一次又一次地失敗，終於讓我從中領悟真正的我。

啊~多麼痛的領悟。

小時候的我，一直都是在聽從大人們的話。用功讀書、聽從指示、懂得禮貌、為人著想，只要是能夠討大人們的歡心，規規矩矩地做個大人們喜歡的孩子，我就覺得我立了大功，未來的路就應該這麼走准沒錯。然而，那樣的我一走就已經走了20多年。一直到了我大學畢業，思想還是那樣。我身旁周遭的人，有些可能認為我已成熟了，但事實上我並沒有。很喜歡搞幼稚的我，就一直是我真實原貌。我一直都是活在自己的世界裡。

就算是我領到的第一份理想的工作，都依然沒清醒，就一昧地抱著熱誠努力想做我最好的本分。殊不知這份熱誠卻被上司利用了，看到沒利用價值後就在狠狠地在我背上桶了一刀。

啊~多麼痛的領悟。

第一次的失敗後，就被那次可怕的黑影墮落地度過三個月。一支筆都不敢再去碰。畫畫的興趣完全被黑暗吞噬。還好是一位好友的相助而重回我對畫畫的熱誠，也恢復了我的自信心，重新尋找我理想的工作。但是幾次始終都被狠狠地被淘汰。每一次沒消息或應徵失敗，我都會自責自我反省。過了一個月的掙紮後才覺悟。

我這一生中，根本就沒為自己做過任何事。沒為未來著想、沒為自己鋪路。而且這些都應該在在服兵役或大學時就想好該走什麼路。不只是單單讀好書，而是開始鋪路。什麼都沒有而畢業的我一直在走一條死路。許多人在大學時就為將來開始鋪路。而我就只會愚昧地以為大學就好像上中學或高中一樣，只要讀好考好就一定會有一條路... 在這樣的大人世界裡，根本就沒有像我這種人的容身之地。

啊~多麼痛的領悟。

原來我生活到現在都只是一塊空殼。雖然在痛的領悟中覺悟，但曾經打拼過的我沒留下任何遺憾。

現在已是全新的一年，我為了迎接全新的我，立下新了新的目標。真的希望這條路能走得順利。

The Worst Year. Ever.

In short, this year had been a turmoil for me.

I remembered I read the Fortune reading for Dragon babies during Chinese New Year: You will face many ups and downs in your career this year... which I totally disregard that paragraph I have read. I mean it is just a bit superstitious to believe that. And I believe most people will only believe their own fortune reading when it says something very positive and bright. Who in the world likes to hear negative comments, unless you need constructive criticism and feedback.

But the fortune turned out to be true.

The career turned out to be the most disastrous event in my entire life. I will not go into the exact details. but the incident casted a huge shadow on me, and it took me a long time to recover from the darkness.

I was shouldering many tasks and was very stressed out, so I was complaining how demanding things can be to my fellow colleagues, and one of them went to make small reports on me, which eventually got myself fired. I was rather happy that I can be freed instead. However, the nightmare was actually that I have to serve 1 month notice... as stated “when needed” in the contract.

Within that month, I have done crazy stuff: Pushing my body to the limits, Getting sick without getting MC, Sometimes skip lunch, OT everyday, just to get things done for my bosses wholeheartedly. I stupidly thought they were poor thing because they might not be able to do many things since it was their first time stepping out to be bosses of the company. And hence, they might not be able to manage and plan themselves properly, so if there was anything I can help, I will go all out to help. That was my naive self.

Nobody owes the company anything or whatsoever.

But I just stick to my own character, and pressed on to the very last day, and I thought things could wrap up nicely on time. Whatever task I was assigned, I finished it nicely and fast. But things just came up one after another. I could see no end, even until 10pm. Only after some confrontation, then my bosses decided to let me go. Only after the whole last day I was finally awakened. The true faces of my superiors. I was too bloody stupid. I did not fight for myself. I broke down terribly.

From that day onwards, I have never lifted my pencil for months...

My passion has became a nightmare. Whenever I tried lifting a pencil, I could not draw anything decent anymore. The whole incident just came, throwing at your face... It took me months and friends for me to recover my passion.

But I know after that fateful incident, I have changed to another person...

After a few months, once I have recovered from the incident, I have also went to interview for a localiser position for a Japanese game industry. The email for interview and arrangement came in too fast, and I only had 2 days to prepare, and in between those days I need to work part time. You could day I went to the interview totally unprepared. I not sure why I would allow myself like that... Perhaps the changed person I am now.

Nevertheless, the interview went too bad. It was to the extent that I felt so ashamed for Chiba sensei who has been guiding me throughout my Japanese course in NUS. My Japanese sucked terribly during the interview. Now I would feel the embarrassed moment everytime I face Japanese... which is almost all around my house.

But after this round of interview, I began to feel that my character might not be able to handle work that is related to my passion and interest. So I decided not to venture in games industry, drawing or even things to do with Japanese anymore... Maybe the time when I have enough capital to start my own company. Haha.

But the question now is... What should I do?!

Remembering Griffiths: Canteen

Counting down to the end of this year, we are counting down the last few days of GPS as well. Other than the infrastructure, the culture, the building, the fun, we must not forget the FOOD!!!

Yes, today's episode is about our famous canteen!!! Sorry that I have no photo of the canteen... Probably will try to draw one if I can find time...

I have listed down the stall from left to right according to my best memory possible.
The prices listed down was exactly during the year 1995-2000. So please refrain from exclaiming things like "Huh?! Now things where got so cheap??!"

Stall 1: Snack Stall

Menu (Highlights)
1. Koko Biscuit $0.20
2. Color Bread $0.40/$0.50
3. Pandan Cake $0.40
4. Egg Burger $0.60
5. Fish Burger $0.60
6. Assorted Ice Cream $0.60 - $1.50
7. Assorted Biscuits
8. Assorted Bread
9. Chinese Soup Desserts $0.50 each bowl (Different dessert every day)

This snack shop is my second favorite stall especially when I have no time to eat noodles before my prefect duty during recess. A good egg burger is perfect to start a duty~

I still remember there was a period when many students are crazy about the pencil sorbet ice cream and the toy car shape ice cream. It was really nice for summer period.

Present Fact: The auntie is STILL selling snacks in GPS right now. I still see her walking past around my house void deck area once a while, including this year, 2014.

Stall 2: Malay Rice Stall (Purple Plates)

Menu
1. Nasi Lemak $0.50

Can only remember this....

When I was around Pri5, my appetite rose to an incredible rate, I would order this rice, with additional portion of rice, and add more egg slices, which would cost me $0.90. I would practically eat this portion whenever I need to stay back for ECA (Remember back CCA was referred as ECA?) or some other supplementary class. And I believe that was the time when I started to become less skinny...

Stall 3: Malay Noodles Stall (Pink Plates)

Menu
1. Mee Rebus $0.50
2. Mee Siam $0.50

3. Mee Soto $0.50

This stall made me fall in love with Mee Siam. And so practically whichever Malay noodle stall I patronise, I will only order Mee Siam and nothing else.

Stall 4: Chinese Rice Stall (Green Plates)

Menu
1. White Rice with Fried Egg and Soy Sauce $0.50
2. Chicken Rice $0.50
3. Fried Noodles $0.50
4. Fried Rice $0.50
3. Mixed Rice $0.50 - $1.50

This stall I seldom patronise. Mainly because when I was young, I was still picky with my food choices, especially the greens... So when I see the green plates used by that stall, I will turn away most of the times. If I do patronise, it would be the Rice with Egg since I was an Egg Lover since young. The half cooked yolk was really what attracted me~

Stall 5: Chinese Noodles Stall (Orange Bowl)

Menu
1. Yellow Thick Noodle (Dry/Soup)
2. Maggi Mee (Dry/Soup)
3. Lor Mee
4. Wanton Noodles (Only Available on Monday and Friday) $0.50 - $1

5. Laksa (Only available on Tuesday) $0.50 - $1
6. Mee Siam (Only Available on Wednesday) $0.50 - $1
7. Kway Chap ((Only Available on Thursday) $0.50 - $1
8. Hot Dog $0.10 / $0.30
9. Chicken Wing $0.40
10. Chicken Drumstick $0.70
11. Crabstick $0.20

Obviously, this is my favorite stall. You can probably guess it since this menu is the most detailed. This stall provided the best noodles during my childhood. The auntie practically can chat with me also... Oh, and one of the stall aunties was the mother of a student in our batch, Cai xiong's mother.

Anyway, during my peak appetite period, I also ordered a lot from this stall as well. After either an upsized Nasi Lemak or noodles, I will have my "dessert" with a drumstick and a hot dog or a crabstick with lots of chilli!!! Yum~

Stall 6: Drinks Stall

Menu
1. Coke $0.30
2. Root Beer $0.30
3. Can Drinks $0.70 - $0.80
4. Yakult $0.60 (Will FREE cute random toys with each purchase)

A drink stall is always famous among the sports type students since they always seek out for thirst quencher after a good training or game. So naturally the uncle and the auntie there found themselves mingling more with these students. And of course, they are the only ones who can earn the money from students on Saturdays~ It would have to depends on situation for other food stalls to open on Saturdays.

I was a frequent patron during the period when many people were hyped up about the can drinks with red tab. Hope I did tickled your mind a bit by mentioning the "Coca-Cola" card! The card when everybody collect the tabs like mad to exchange a card that was actually useless to a primary school kid. But for me, other than collecting for fun, the card can also be cut into strips and become a tab for me to do cheat code on my Digimon!

**********

Once again, I apologise for the bad grammar, writing, and no pictures. But hope the ex-Griffithsian still can remember some fun times about the school. I had prepared another post about the classes I had been through. My classes were 1/2, 2/2, 3/6, 4/4, 5/5, 6/6. Hope I can help my ex-classmates remember some of the interesting we had been through together! So, stay tuned!

Remembering Griffiths: The Background

Bringing a special attention to my Primary School.

Due to the decresing number of primary one students each year, MOE has decided to merge the school with Qiaonan Primary School and thus will be renamed as Angsana Primary School effectively next year 2015. As such, I decided to write posts about the school, my life in the school, and most importantly, to try to remember about the people I have met in this school.

Let's now turn back time to 1995-2000

(The only old picture I can find before the school was remodelled)

Principal
1995-1999: Ms Mary Fletcher
1999-2000: Miss Choy Poh Chun

History of GPS
I remembered the school started in the year when I was born, 1988. It was situated just right beside my house. It is practically and literally just a few steps away from the void deck of my flat. It was so convenient that if I forgot to bring my homework before the flag raising ceremony, I could just walk briskly back up my house to retrieve it, make my way back in just less than 5 minutes. Oops, digress too much.

Crest, Motto, School Song and Uniform
The most memorable line in the school: To seek, to strive, to find.
Not only it is the motto of the school, it was also written in the lyrics of our song.
And the color of the school uniform is Green, Top was Light Green, and Bottom is Dark Green. The PE Attire was the same as well. (Actually my school uniform was Green all the way. Pasir Ris Sec: Rusty Green, and Tampines JC: Light Green). 

The Crest with a burning torch which signifes quest for knowledge. While the color yellow stands for aspiring and caring, and green represents the refreshing innocence of children.

The school has two different sessions.
Morning (7.30AM - 12PM+): P2, P4, P6
Afternoon (12PM - 6PM+): P1, P3, P5

Morning Session Flow
If is a dry season, the students will assemble on the outdoors, and different Pri Level will have different assemble locations. Then teachers will bring each groups to the parade square for Flag Raising Ceremony and then followed by singing the school song on every Monday. If is wet outdoors, then the assemble point for everyone will be in the hall and the ceremony will take place in the hall as well.

Afternoon Session Flow

The assemble point will be in the hall for everyone and the class will shortly be guided to their respective class by their teachers. When the last class of the day ended, the students will all proceed to the parade square for the Flag Lowering Ceremony. For wet weather, it will be in the hall.

Parents in the Past

I remember every time when I stepped into the school via the sidegate, I will need to walk past a mini ecogarden, and then past the bookshop and into the canteen. And then you would see many students hopping around instead of assembling neatly and the aunties chatting with each other in the canteen. That was the past... It has been a while now that outsiders are not allowed in school premises anymore due to security reasons. 

It was so nice back then when parents are still allowed to enter school as freely... Like during heavy rain, all the students will come to the school with slippers and upon reaching, the parents will help their kids to dry their feet and put on their white shoes. Sometimes parents even wait for their kids during recess to deliver homemade snacks or forgot-to-bring homeworks...

Recess Activites

The most happening 30-40 minutes in school life. And you will see different groups of people at this time. 

The normal eating student. Like me, I will always go for my favorite noodles stall for my Lor Maggie Mee because you can only enjoy the food for 6 years. So better eat all you can. 

The hyperactive student. This group of people will skip their breaks and go to soccer field, the field, volleyball court or basketball court to play their games. There was one unique spot for similar squash game as well. It was a corner near basketball court where some kids like to playing kicking squash. It was a game which you kick a small ball to a wall and wait for the ball to bounce back and let the next player to kick the ball again. 

The less hyperactive student. This usually refers to girls, because their hanging out areas are usually under shelter like the space outside the bookshop. The girls will play with the stairs, hopscotch, zero point (the game to play with a big hoop made by rubber bands), etc. 

And of course the last group is the mix. The play after you eat student. 

Hope that will help us remember many good memories of the school.

Stay tuned for the next post about canteen!

20

Ever since the use of handphones and then smartphones began popularized and became a part of a necessities in developed countries, the lives of many people in many nations have significantly changed.

But is it for Better?
Or for Worse?

Indeed, the primary purpose of inventing such devices was for good intentions. However, the purpose has evolved into a much malice such that humans have now became slaves of technology.

With a phone at hand, even after working hours, they are expected to receive headaching calls from bosses and clients, and also replying work emails.
With a phone at hand, people are constantly looking down and enjoy the comfort in their own private bubble.
With a phone at hand,  the world has become more and more economic driven, more and more competitive, and make use of this convenience to create all sorts of "wonders" and seek to "improve" human lives better.

So if one day, a hand from the sky took away the phone from every human on earth...
Just Imagine.
Without a phone in hand.
The world would probably turn back 20 years ago.
When the world is less complicated...
At least that is what I think...

Ever since I have stepped into the working life, I have heard nothing but people constantly asking how this or that business generate revenue. How can you turn your business into a pool of profits. And when you have attained a stable business, they will start to ask, how would you do to raise the value and earn even more?

Times changed a lot rapidly these 20 years of my life. When I was still a Primary School kid, I hear most working adults are happy with their lives. Having a stable job and a happy family is just simply pleasant. However, after 20 years, I have finally become one of them, but the definition has changed a lot.

People changed. The younger generations have desire for more. People no longer comfortable with sticking to a thing and use it for as long as they one. Once they think it have no use for them anymore, they ditch it and go for a better one. People are no longer satisfied with a stable job. They want to go higher. So high. Until to an altitude that suffocate all the working adults now. Ironically.

People have been constantly saying to make the world better. But in fact. It isn't.

The definition of Capitalism and Economic have driven people crazy. All companies and even government are working their ways not to improve our lives anymore. They are all blinded by the concepts. The only way to survive is not just to feed and shelter and love yourself anymore. The new criterion is to have a strong economic holding. People are now aiming to have a higher foothold.

The word money has reached a whole new level.
Even government in Singapore is going all the way to suck people money...
Openly...
I know I'm ignorant. I know nothing about economics or whatever.
But why people just want to keep going higher? To a height that is no oxygen for them.

Money, the root of all evil.
The statement stands firm.

Let the world continue in the endless World War.
The war which determines which country has the strong currency...

Choosing a simple life is not a choice anymore...